


The mew girl in town

by asheykat, Eyas



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-05
Updated: 2014-07-22
Packaged: 2017-12-22 13:26:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 12,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/913723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asheykat/pseuds/asheykat, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eyas/pseuds/Eyas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first day of school can be tough</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Embarrasement

**Author's Note:**

> I had quite a bit of help with this unfortunately i dont know all of their Ao3 names... I hope it looks ok theres more to come, Leave comments and suggestions and etc. or where you would like to see this go ^.^

It was your furst day at school, and if you were going to be completely honest with yourself you were purrety dang furrightened. Efurryone had told you how freshman year was always the worse and how efurryone was so mean. So not only that being on the top of your “things I’m not looking furward to” list, it was also a brand new school and you didn’t really know anyone... Except Equius your neighbor. And while he was nice and sweet he was also purrety scary himself. Especially when he became passionate about a topic. You quickly got up, getting dressed and brushing your teeth, befure grabbing your kitty hat and heading out the door. The school wasn’t that far furrom your house so it wasn’t too difficult to walk, taking only about 10-15 minutes. 

When you got to school they showed you your locker, which you immediately put most of your books, you didn’t need them until after lunch anyway, and headed to the cafeteria. When Equius said that this was where efurryone hung out in the mornings you thought he was ofur exaggerating but when you walked in it looked as though efurry single student in the school was there. You were definitely glad at that moment that it was such a small school, making it easy to find Equius. Not that it would have been difficult either way, seeing as how there was one boy sitting with them that was going on a rant, that strangely efurryone was managing to tune out. You sat down next to Equius, who happened to be glaring at the angry boy. When you took a look at him your breath caught. You couldn’t take your eyes off him, you were taking in efurry detail. You could tell just by looking at him that he was an Albino, this within itself was interesting as you had nefur seen one befur now. His skin was pale, which was to be expected, and he had pale blonde hair. The most eye catching thing howefur was his eyes. They were a bright cherry red, and you couldn’t help but find yourself staring at them. Until of course he shouted at you. “HEY! CAN I HELP YOU WITH SOMETHING? GOD DAMNIT... ANYBODY HOME IN THERE?” He was now waving his hand in your face and you blinked as your face turned a bright pink.

~ ~ ~

You were sitting there in the cafeteria during one of your usual rants about how utterly stupid and ridiculous Twilight was and how you couldn’t see what all the appeal was and how every single person who fangirled over Robert Pattinson “LIKE OH MY GOD, HES SO FUCKING AMAZING. I TURN INTO A STEAMING PILE OF HORMONES JUST LOOKING AT HIM JESUS FUCKING CHRIST” and how it was just fucking annoying. You honestly did not understand the appeal. You had just transferred your rant to be on the topic of squealing middle school girls and how they practically ruin everything for you when you heard a noise beside you: “Psssst KK”, except it sounded more like “Ptttthhht”. Hey, you already knew you were a horrible fucking person you may as well embrace it.  
“Pssssst KK... Hey listen...” You roll your eyes and divert your attention to him.  
“WHAT NOW SOLLUX? CAN’T YOU SEE I’M IN THE MIDDLE OF ONE OF MY RANTS? THIS BETTER BE FUCKING IMPORTANT OR I SW-” You’re cut off by him shushing you. As in, he is literally papping you and saying Shh with his other finger over his lips. God damn it you don’t have time for this shit. You lower your voice before you respond again.   
“Fuck Sollux what the hell do you want? This better be good” You glare at him and watch as he tilts his head to the new girl sitting at the table. You look over then look back at him with a “What the fuck is this about” look. He just gives you a look like keep watching so you look back at her. You really don’t see the goddamn point in this she’s just sitting there. It isn’t even like she’s doing anything special if she was doing flips or some shit you would understand. But she’s not. Unless what he’s trying to do is get you to check her out, in which case you rove your eyes quickly over her figure. She had medium length black hair, and a slight tan. You couldn’t tell if that was because she spent a lot of time out in the sun or if it was because she had a small fraction of Asian in her blood line, as in maybe 1/6th Asian. However, her having Asian in her bloodline was the best explanation you could come up with; because nothing else explained the almost cat like shape in her green eyes, which while slightly odd you had to admit was pretty damn cool. Although you wouldn't ever let anyone catch you admitting that out loud. She had a blue cat hat on, with cat ears poking out of them and while you didn’t understand teenage girls and their obsession with cosplays it didn't look half bad on her.  
You felt a nudge and looked over to Sollux who was giving you an incredulous look and tilted his head back to her. Ok... so he wasn’t asking you to check her out.  
“GOD DAMNIT SOLLUX WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT” He glared at you and you looked back. This time you noticed exactly what it was he was trying to direct your attention to. God you felt stupid, the entire time you had been checking her out she hadn’t moved. She was staring at you. Ok that’s a little bit fucking creepy but there had to be a reason. You ran your hand over your face to make sure that wasn't the reason, then gave Sollux an “Is there something on my face?” look and he shook his head and smirked. Oh... well fuck. Only one way to solve this then. “UH... HEY!” she didn’t respond. Whatever she was thinking it was a damn intense thought. “GOD DAMNIT... HEY! NEW GIRL! EARTH TO CAT GIRL! HEY CAN I HELP YOU WITH SOMETHING? GOD DAMN IT” You started waving your hand in her face “ANYBODY HOME IN THERE?” Oh look... a reaction. About fucking time. She blinked at you and her face turned a bright shade of pink, an interesting look against her tan skin that didn't look half bad on her. In fact it almost looked damn adorable. But again, you wouldn’t let anyone catch you admitting that out loud. Oh shit... what’s she doing now? Is that tears? You look over and see Equius glaring at you as she quickly gathers her things and runs out of the cafeteria. God damn it you have never felt like more of an asshole in your life.


	2. Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat and Nepeta go through the events of that day and find themselves thinking a tad bit more than they probably should

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I went to do the different colors for the pesterlog but I can't figure it out on here and I'm much too lazy for that so... my apologies. Also, found out why authors dont put nepetas typing quirk into her rps... that was annoying to find out

Classes that day sucked, as you soon found out. Not only did you still not really know anyone but Karkat (as you later learned his name was) was in, well, all of your classes. The classes themselves were easy, just the teacher telling you what you were going to be learning in there handing out syllabi and telling you what you needed. So of course, you spent most of your classes drawing. Karkitty didn’t talk to you a whole lot, which you assumed to be your fault since you were in fact caught staring. He must have thought of you as the creepy new girl that was the only thought running through your head fur most of the classes. Occasionally you felt like someone was watching you and you would look up, only to see Karkitty hiding his face behind his hand. Each time you saw that it broke your heart a little. Especially when the only thing you could think of was kissing his soft lips. You shook your head out and planted your head on your desk, now at home. There was no way he would efur like you like that and you knew it. You sighed and picked your head up and turned on your laptop, deciding the best thing fur these sadness blues was to talk to a close friend and maybe read a few fanfictions. You turned on your pesterchum and saw adiosToreador was online. Purrfect.  
arsenicCatnip[ac] began pestering adiosToreador[at]  
AC: *the mighty huntress stalks her purrey, appurrouching furrom behind*  
AT: tHE, uHH, mIGHTY BULL STANDS IN THE FIELD, eATING, aND, uH COMPLETELY UNAWARE.  
AC: *ac leaps into the air pouncing on her furriend and nuzzles him* hi tafurros!  
AT: uH, hI NEPETA,,, wHAT’S UP?  
AC: *acs tail droops and she looks pouty* i kinda really messed up today tafurros :((  
AT: i’M SURE IT CAN’T BE ALL THAT BAD,,, rIGHT?  
AC: well its my furst day of school and i already made myself look stupid..  
AT: wELL, uHH, wHY DON’T YOU TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED,,, aND i’LL SEE WHAT i CAN DO,,,,  
AC: I got caught staring at a boy. *ac looks ashamed of herself*  
AT: oH,,, wELL i CAN SEE HOW THAT MIGHT BE BAD BUT MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO HIM,,, aND, uHH, jUST EXPLAIN THAT YOU WERE NOT QUITE ALL THERE,,, i DON’T KNOW IF THAT HELPS,,,  
AC: *ac purrks up and tackle hugs her furriend* that’s purrfect tafurros! you’re the best :33  
AT: i’M, uHH, rEALLY GLAD i COULD HELP  
arsenicCatnip[ac] ceased pestering adiosToreador[at]  
You really did feel a lot better. You knew you could always count on Tafurros to do that fur you. You stretched out on your bed, feeling kinda tired and unsure what the next day would bring fur you. You also felt purrety excited and scared. You wondered if you should tell him you liked him and decided against it, you were purrety sure he didn’t feel the same. You instead decided that you would just have to work to get ofur him. As you fell asleep you nefur realized that would be a lot easier said than done.  
~ ~ ~  
You’re classes that day was absolutely fucking shit. Most of the kids in your classes where what you deemed as fucking stupid dicks who couldn’t tell their head from their asses even if they tried. Occasionally you had a class with Sollux and Gamzee, two people you could at least tolerate, and you had one class with Equius, which was spent with him glaring at you and fussing over Nepeta. Oh yea, did you forget to mention you had EVERY SINGLE CLASS WITH HER. Yea, it might have slipped your mind.

That’s right folks, this giant dickwad had every single class with the girl he made cry. He wanted to slam your head into your desk. You would have too if it wasn’t for the fact that she also sat RIGHT FUCKING NEXT TO YOU. You didn’t know how things could get any worse. Except that you did, and it did. And that way would be that you couldn’t even manage to talk to her to apologize because not only were you scared out of your fucking mind of what would happen if you accidentally made her cry again, but also because you didn’t even know what to say. Step right up folks, and see the amazing dipshit who can make a girl cry in less than five minutes and is so much of a douche he doesn’t even apologize. You groaned to yourself and facepalmed. You didn’t understand how you could be so fucking stupid.  
Oh and she draws. And not that stupid ass stick figure drawings most kids did in class, that littered their fucking papers. No, she was like a fucking artist it was amazing and you couldn’t help but watch her. It was fucking fascinating. Except you almost got caught staring a couple of times. And what does this dumb ass do when he freaks out about getting caught staring? He fucking covers his face with his hand. Making it look like you didn’t want to fucking see her. God you were stupid and you could tell because every time you did it you could see this hurt look go across her face. She must have thought you were disgusted by her. You couldn’t honestly blame her for hating you, as far as you were concerned you were the worse piece of shit on the planet. Of course Sollux gave you no end of shit for it at lunch. Especially when you were quiet. You got a multitude of “Wow KK you really fucked up thith time” Laughing at his lisp in your head only made you feel a little bit better... “Did you thee the look on her fathe? The probably hateth you.” At which point you would tell him to SHUT THE FUCK UP because he had no fucking clue what he was talking about and was just making the situation worse. Luckily for you equius had forced her to sit as far away from you at the table as possible so she couldn’t hear Sollux badgering you like a moron.  
When you got home you messaged Kanaya, knowing she would know what to do, like she always did. She told you to apologize for yelling at the “poor sweet thing” and tell her how you hadn’t meant to frighten her. You also told her about your slight crush that seemed to be forming for her and the fact that she was a wonderful artist and how fucking jealous you were of anyone who was able to share that with her. She told you to just tell her how you felt. You said no fucking way in hell was that ever going to be a thing that you did. You passed out on your bed feeling grumpy as usual and hateful. You also swore you would probably make anyone who touched her inappropriately regret their sad and pathetic existence. If you weren’t going to ask her out you could at least try to become her best fucking friend.


	3. Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat apologizes and nep makes another friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so I'm sorry this took so long just feeling a bit lazy and only just got google docs on my iPad so it's prob gonna look a little different than usual. Anyway this is gonna mostly be Nep/Kat but I'm thinking of having other ships in there as well until they finally get together and such. Hope you guys still like it just the same. This is the longest work I've ever done as a whole I don't usually do multiple chapters so ^.^

When you get to school the next day you see Karkitty flagging you down. You feel your face turn a deep shade of red as you blush, then shake your head and sit next to him. "Hi Karkitty!" You hear him mumble something but you aren't entirely sure of what. Your confusion apparently shows up on your face because then he clears his throat and looks embarrassed. "My name isn't "karkitty" it's karkat" he has a grumpy look on his face and you know he's trying so hard to look serious but you can't help but giggle. He makes anofur face at you "WHAT'S SO GOD DAMN FUNNY?" His cheeks are even more red now which causes you to smile, before trying to make an innocent face "Oh I'm sorry Karkitty, it's nothing I purromise". You hear him mumble something along the lines of "god damn cat puns" causing you to stick your tongue out at him. His eyes widen and he sputters befur turning away grumbling. You look across furrom Karkitty and see Kanaya giving him a pointed look, causing you to be confused. She then clears her throat causing him to look up. "Oh fu- ok ok Maryam I'm sorry I forgot ok?" His voice was raised but it sounded different than usual, almost nervous and higher pitched. You see her glare at him then he winces just as she moves, you can only assume she kicked him, an odd thought considering how prim and proper she appeared to be. He slowly turned on the bench to look at you, his eyes focused on the ground as he shouted at you "I'm really fucking sorry for yelling at you yesterday, it wasn't my intentions to frighten you... " he grumbles before continuing "I hope you can fucking forgive me and I would like to be your friend if you will let me even though I'm a huge asshole but to be quite frank you are one of the only ones in this school who doesn't seem to be a giant tool!" This last word seems more pointed and you give a quizzical look as Sollux snickers behind him. You smile brightly however, happy to receive this compliment befur remempurring you're suppawsed to get ofur him and instantly make a more serious face. "Thank you for apawlagizing..." You both wince at that one, you do believe that one may have been pushing it a little bit "Uh.. Thanks and I would be purrfectly ok being your furriend" you giggle and smile at him. Getting ofur your crush fur him his gonna be difficult but you sure are gonna try. Fur not only the sake of your heart but fur your furriendship as well.

The bell rings and you go to class. You spend most of your classes alternating between drawing and talking to Karkitty. Sometimes he asks you about your drawings and seems really inpurrested which makes you happy, but then you snap yourself out of it. Lunch is fairly inpurresting mainly be claws of the seating arrangements. A couple of people decided to move around and you had to adjust, as well as deal with Equius' angry mumbles beclaws he couldn't sit by you. You managed to fix that by telling him to sit across furrom you, but he was still "highly unpleased". Instead you had Karkitty and Sollux (the seating change that was most odd to you) on either side of you, Sollux smirking and Karkitty looking flabbergasted at him. Across from you it went: Aradia, Equius, Gamzee. With Kanaya next to Karkitty and Vwhiskers across furrom her, a purrson you weren't entirely sure of as she seemed kind of mean and rude. Occasionally she would shoot glares at you furrom across the table and then flinch and yell at Kanaya.

During the rest of your classes Sollux talked to you a lot more, sitting on your ofur side furrom Karkitty and occasionally stealing his spot. In those occasions you could hear Karkitty grumbling like an old man and it left you furry confused. Sollux usually just smirked. At the end of the day they both tried to give you their trollian handles, before Karkitty had to go meet up with a John purrson. You only knew him beclaws when Sollux stole his spot he sat by him instead. It was a furry odd day and when you got home you were glad fur the lack of homework. You instead got on your laptop, when you saw that Sollux hadn't hesitated to message you.

TA: hey NP.   
AC: oh hi sollux! how are you?  
TA: iim pretty decent ii ju2t had a que2tiion ii kiinda wanted to ask you.  
AC: *acs tail swishes as her head tilts slightly to the side, incredibly curious and inpurrested*  
TA: heh, ii wanted two know if there wa2 anyone at 2chool you were iintere2ted iin.  
You could feel yourself blush and you mentally started freaking out. There was no way you could tell him especially not since he was so close to Karkitty. That would be way to embarrassing.  
AC: *ac blushes and looks at you with wide eyes* uh no not really... I just got here so I haven't really had the time to figure out who efurryone is or anything... why do you ask?  
TA: oh ii was ju2t curiious ii thought you had already found an iintere2t that2 all.   
AC: *ac blushes even more* nope! what made you think that?  
TA: ob2ervation2. oh well ii'm 2ure 2omeone wiill come along and woo you. ii have two go two bed. night NP.  
AC: *ac yawns* night!

You stare at your screen fur awhile. That was a close one. If you're going to get ofur your crush you are going to need to be more careful what you show on your face. You yawn and stretch and decide its time fur bed. You see karkitties name blink on your screen, but you're too tired to answer him now. You'll just ask him what he needed tomorrow.  
~~~~~~~  
You see Nep in the morning, which for some reason makes you a little excited. Much to Sollux's amusement you wave her over and you see a smile on her face, causing you to blush. You quickly try to hide it but when she sits down the first thing she says to you is "Hi Karkitty!" Oh my god, did she just call you Karkitty? You mumble about how fucking adorable that is when she gives you a confused look. Shit. You shout something about how you're name isn't Karkitty it's karkat damnit and you'd prefer if she didn't use cat puns on your name. You try to look at her seriously to show you mean business, which is a bit difficult since her calling you Karkitty is so god damned cute and you really don't care either way, but you have an angry image to keep up. You see her giggle and know your serious face didn't work and you blush, why is everything about her so fucking adorable? It's like someone found the gene that causes cuteness and injected it into her damn blood stream. "WHAT THE FUCK IS SO FUNNY?" She assures you that it's nothing, even though you know that's a god damn lie, with this god damned innocent look on her face and when you look at it you can't help but give in. It doesn't help that she uses cat puns, something you curse about under your breath but she apparently heard and sticks her tongue out at you. You have no idea how to respond to that, your eyes widening as suddenly thoughts of how cat like her tongue is and "I wonder what else she can do with that thing" enter your muddled brain. You internally berate yourself for thinking such things as you turn to face the table, looking like a moron. 

You keep your gaze plastered on the table as you try to stop being a fucking pervert. Suddenly from across you, you hear Kanaya clear her throat and look up startled. After uttering an apology to her, for forgetting to apologize to nepeta, and getting kicked in the shin you turn to face Nepeta. You can hear Sollux laughing at you quietly behind you and make a note to self to kick his ass later. You then utter the most ridiculous apology you've ever fucking heard; to which she thanks you for "apawlogizing", which makes you wince because while the other ones were cute that one grates on your ears, and accepts your hand in friendship putting you officially in the "friend zone" which until now you believed was just some bullshit guys liked to create to make others feel sorry for themselves, assholes, but now you are forcefully placing yourself there and you have a feeling you're going to fucking regret it.

During class you watch her draw, finally able to ask her questions. At one point she draws you and fuck if it doesn't look exactly like you. She mostly draws cats but occasionally, by your request, she draws one your friends. When lunch comes around Sollux sits on nepetas other side instead of by you and you can't help but feel suspicious. He also talks to her a lot more than usual and when she isn't looking smirks at you in a way that tells you he's definitely plotting something. During classes it doesn't get much better, as the asshole either sits on her other side again or takes your seat if another isn't available next to her. At which point you sit next to John while Sollux smugly apologizes, which you know he doesn't fucking mean because he knows you hate how much John fucking talks. If he could shut his mouth for five seconds you'd probably be a lot better. It also doesn't help that you've been avoiding him because you know he wants your help with some stupid project, which he now asks you about and your obligated to say you'll go over today and help.

At the end of the day you give her your pesterchum, receiving hers in turn and watch as Sollux does the same and you grumble about how you have to go. Helping John with his project was non-eventful, as it was quick and easy and the biggest reason he wanted you over was to ask you for help. "Karkat I just don't know what to do she hasn't been talking to me lately at all." You rub the bridge of your nose with your fingers and groan. You saw this coming. "John Jesus fuck she's just busy. And if you really like her this much just fucking ask her out you dipshit" John blushes, like he usually does when you mention him asking Rose out and it's so fucking derpy he reminds you of a damn puppy dog. He fiddles with the hem of his shirt before speaking "But what if she doesn't feel the same and I look stupid." You feel like bashing your head against a wall. While its true that everyone knows Kanaya has a slight thing for Rose and Rose definitely reciprocated, everyone also knew that they had tried previously but due to kanayas feelings for Vriska, something you never understood, it didn't really work out and they were just friends now. Friends with occasional benefits. You really didn't want to think about that at the moment. The point was, it would take a fucking idiot to not see that Rose had feelings for John. Even before she talked a lot she was friendly with him and has flirted with him on many occasions. You sighed "I'm sure you have nothing to worry about, just fucking do it. I have to go home though John, it's getting late and my dad will be fucking pissed if I'm not home soon." With that you stood up, shaking your head as you said your good byes and headed home.

As soon as you got home you messages Nepeta.  
CG: HEY NEP...  
CG: ARE YOU EVEN THERE?   
CG: FUCKING SOLLUX GOT YOUR ATTENTION FIRST DIDN'T HE THE DAMN ASSHOLE. YOU'RE PROBABLY IN BED NOW ANYWAY  
CG: ILL JUST TALK TO YOU TOMORROW.. NIGHT NEPETA.  
You stared at your unresponsive screen. You swear to god if Sollux made a move... Ever since him and Aradia broke up and became just friends he had been talking about finding someone new. And while he liked Feferi she was just "two popular and unapproachable". You cussed at your screen, causing your dad to yell at you to go to bed. You crawled in and hoped that you wouldn't come across any problems tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will prob have a bit of solnep and more angry karkat :3


	4. The one that got away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh that's gotta sting... In which one ship sails and another is thought to be sunk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BRING OUT YOUR SHIPS -rings a bell- BRING OUT YOUR SHIPS!

When you got too school the next day you were instantly side swept by Karkitty, who stopped you before you could even walk into the cafeteria. He looked you dead in the eyes and looked even grumpier than usual. He stood there staring you down for awhile then huffed. "DID ANYTHING HAPPEN AFTER SCHOOL YESTERDAY?" He sounded like he thought he mew the answer but didn't want to be right. "Uh, not really. Not anything furry impurrtant why?" He breathed a sigh of relief.

Weeks later: ~~~~~~~   
As you walks into the cafeteria, with Karkitty on one side talking about purrezi (making you feel slightly jealous but you were getting much better at hiding it) and Kanaya on the ofur talking about Rose. You were purrety sure rose and Kanaya liked each ofur and you definitely shipped it, but you also knew that Kanaya liked vwhiskers, rose liked John and both girls had yet to come out as bisexual? You were unsure what each girls orientation was but figured either way it was purrfectly ok beclaws they were your furriends and that's all that mattered. You were just about to interject, as Karkitty started ranting about vwhiskers, when suddenly Aradia was in furront of you with a mischievous look on her face. "I believe you are required in the courtyard after classes today. I suggest you go unattended." She sounded excited, but you weren't entirely sure as her voice tended to be furry flat. She was furry purrety and your best furriend Equius had a huge crush on her. Unfurtunately, beclaws of his attitude towards some things she did not reciprocate. You nodded and made an odd face and sat down.  
You looked around confused. Pawlux had moved furrom his usual spot by you to on the complete opposite side of the table. That actually kind of hurt. You had grown to have a small crush on him, not as big as the one on Karkitty but you didn't talk about that, and he became one of your close furriends. You worried about if you had done anything to upset him and thought back to the night befurs conversation. He was purrety quiet, and didn't talk as much as usual and you felt down. You barely picked at your food, and didn't notice Karkitty looking at you worriedly and barely heard the conversation at hand. You barely got through class, Sollux sitting a great distance from you and looking upset, so you mainly doodled during class. After school you barely remembered to go to the courtyard but Kanaya reminded you. Karkitty offered to go with but you said no.  
When you walked out there, heaving a sigh, you were surpurrised to find Pawlux standing there looking awkward. He opened his mouth but you rushed to speak furst "I'm really sorry if I've upset you I didn't mean to and purrlease don't stop talking to me fur what efur it was I did just tell me and ill fix it I swear!" By this point you had broken into tears and was using your sleeve to wipe your eyes. Pawlux came rushing up and hugged you, something that you don't think you efur saw him do. "No NP, what maketh you think I think I'm upthet?" He sighed "I'm sorry this was my fault, I was just too scared to talk to you..." You looked up at him with wide eyes, confused by what he said and unsure if you just misheard it because of his lisp. "I wanted to ask if you would go to the movies this weekend" His face scrunched up and he moved his hand to rub the back of his neck and looked up "I mean you don't have to, but I really like you NP and I was kinda figuring if you wanted to we could go out" You stared and smiled at him then hugged him "Of course!"  
~~~~  
You stared out the window, and almost ran out to punch Sollux in his stupid face when you saw nep crying. You knew this was the reason shed been upset all day. The minute you sat down at lunch. The stupid asshole, nervous or not you don't fuck with a girl like that, espicially nepeta. Hasn't he watched /any/ of the romcoms you let him lent him? Obviously not. You knew nepeta liked him, how could you not? She talked to him constantly as of late, always smiling. You would have known even if she hadn't told you. Which stung, but you knew that was your own fault. So you looked at the other person you had affections for, who did not appear to feel the same. God damn you must really be an asshole if you can't find a single person who reciprocates your feelings. You sigh in relief when she hugs him and has a huge smile on her face. Even though its not very convenient for you as long as she's happy you really don't give a shit. You walk off to meet up with Terezi, seeing as nepeta is fine on her own. When you find her she's staring at a blank wall. "It's blank Terezi, and even though you're blind I know you can tell" it was fucking creepy how she did it. "Hehehe there's my candy red karkat!" She turned around, a shark grin pointed at you. "I was doing it to fuck with the other people in the hall." You stifle a laughter at the thought of the looks on their faces as they try to comprehend a blind girl staring at a blank wall. You take her hand and start headed out to walk her home. Even though she doesn't need it she's told you she appreciates it when you do. The entire time you can help but make yourself feel like shit thinking about nepeta with Sollux.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry karkats part is short this time y'all next chapter will maybe be more focused on him. Any ships you want to see comment! We'll prob to through a ton. Also sorry bout the feels :3


	5. Life is a lemon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long guys, i've been really busy with school and stuff v.v I just get really easily distracted and it takes me awhile before i figure out what i want to do next with this. If you guys want to give ideas go for it and comments are always welcome. Also, sorry it's such a short chapter.

Months had gone by. You and Pawlux had been doing really well, and then a new girl transferred schools. Her name was Fefurri, and she was really nice but you could tell she had a huge crush on Pawlux. And he reciprocated. You sat there talking to karkitty about it, and he got kind of angry but you don't really understand why.   
AC: :33 I dunno karkitty... i dont think it really matters. if he wants to be with her instead he should be able to.  
CG: GOD DAMN IT NEPETA, THAT'S NOT THE POINT!  
AC: :33 then what is? i just don't understand why its a big fuss.  
A tear dropped onto your keyboard. It hurt enough as it was, to know that there was anofur purrson you just were not good enough fur. Having one of them arguing with you about it didn't really help a whole lot. He continued going on about how it wasn't fair you had to go through this, and if only there was someone who would treat you right. You knew you said you'd ignore it but it's hard. Especially with efurrything going on. After awhile, you and pawlux talked about the thing going on with fefurri. You decided it was best if the two of you stayed furriends. You knew it was fur the best, but it still upset you. Not beclaws you were just broken up with, but beclaws you just felt like you could not catch a break. Karkitty was with purrezi and seemed furry happy and you were so happy fur him, but it just seemed unfair. You sat in your room that night not really talking to anybody. Equius tried pestering you but you refused to answer. Actually, if you were to be purrfectly honest tafuros had messaged you furst and then, your assuming, went to Equius to see if he would have any better luck. You were purrfectly content here under your blankets and nothing could change that. Until of course there was a knock on your door and someone walked in. "Mooooom leave me beeee" "WELL... WHEN I WAS TOLD YOU WERE BEING FUCKING PATHETIC I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS THIS BAD" You hissed under your breath. Of all the people that could have walked in or come over to check on you and it was him. The one purrson you didn't really want to see right now. You poke your head out furrom under your blanket and give him the meanest glare you can manage. He just gives a flicker of a smile and sits on the edge of your bed hugging you. "Do I need to kick his ass?" You sigh, happy to just have this, and this comfort even if you do feel selfish fur wishing it was more. "No... its ok. ill get ofur it"  
~~~~~~~~~~  
You honestly should have seen it coming. You and Terezi were going good for awhile, and you thought you might have a chance. But then you caught the way she reacted whenever Dave talked to her and backed out of the race. You liked her and everything, but it wasn't really worth fighting for it and especially when shed be much happier with him. Even if he was an ironic tool. They eventually started dating, and while you were concerned you focused mainly on Nepeta. She was going through a tough time and it wasn't right. You wish you hadn't been such a jerk that first day. You wish you weren't such a jerk in general. You wanted her to be happy, and she obviously no longer was with Sollux. The asshole. You would normally have you few choice words for him but Nepeta begged that you wouldn't. So when you saw them go off to the side that one day, and saw Sollux looking guilty, then Nepeta's deadpan face... Well suffice to say it didn't take a genius to know what was going on there. She sat back down with a calmness that was uncanny, all things considered, and Sollux refused to look you in the eyes the entire day. You wanted nothing more than to punch him. When you got a message from Terezi stating that Nepeta wasn't responding to anyone, you knew you had to walk over there and comfort her. When she let you hold her in your arms it felt nice, and like it was right. You made soothing noises as she cried, and gently rubbed circles on her back. You wished you could make it better, but you settled for just being there for her. It was a weekend so your parents didn't really care when you got home and you ended up falling asleep like that.


	6. Wouldn't it be nice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still have not gotten into the habit of updating more regularly... And I apologize. It takes me awhile to get off my butt and think about what I want to do next. Feel free to leave comments and suggestions, its usually what causes me to update more frequently.. If you have any ideas on where to take this feel free to let me know and ill take it into consideration :3

When you woke up you felt arms wrapped around you. It confused you quite a bit, but you didn't really care enough to try to think about it. Who efur it was, was warm and comfurtable and that was something you desperately needed after yesterday. Yesterday... you suddenly remembered exactly what happened yesterday and did your best not to start crying again. You buried your face into the purrsons chest and tried desperately to go back to sleep again. When you heard their voice, your eyes snapped wide open. "Nepeta..? Are you awake? Are you ok?" You started having a mental freak out. The purrson you were lying on, who had their arms around you was karkitty. You desperately tried to think back and remember if anything had happened but you really couldn't think of anything. You closed your eyes and purrtended to go back to sleep, so you could avoid the awkward conversation at hand. You so were not purrpared fur this. Of all the things you could pawsibly be purrpared fur this was not one of them. You felt him make soothing motions on your back and yawn, the touch on your back making you actually fall asleep again. This was really nice. You could really get used to this if it wasnt fur the fact that you knew he liked purrezi and that you didn't have a shot. He had become your best furriend in the few months that passed and while you were happy fur that, you couldn't help but want to be selfish and ask fur more. You're breathing had become a lot heavier as you started to pass out when you felt a purressure on the top of your head. Did... Did he just kiss your head? You internally squealed at how down right adorable that was. When you woke up fur good the next time, you realized you were on your side and the bed was empty beside you. You were a little saddened befur you heard talking downstairs and went down to find Karkitty talking to mewlin. When you walked in he looked up at you and smiled, causing you to creep in cautiously. "Hey nep! We were just making bets on how long it would take you to wake up!" You saw mewlin laugh and squinted your eyes at them. "Ha ha furry funny you two." You sat down and poured yourself a bowl of cereal. When you finished eating, you asked karkitty when he needed to be home and when he said whenefur you guys sat on the couch watching romcoms. Even though the two of you had been purractically snuggling upstairs, you kept a usual healthy just friends distance. It felt a bit pawkward since you were unsure what honestly was going on and you really liked him. You made a mental note to find out what was going on and ask around on what ofurs knew. You didn't think you'd find out furry much though.  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
You heard her stirring after you had been up for awhile. You didn't want to move because you were scared it would disturb her sleeping. You felt her nuzzle into your chest and some noises and wrapped your arm around her tighter, concerned. When she didn't respond to you asking if she was ok you figured she was just moving in her sleep and continued making soothing motions. When you were positive she was fully asleep again, you placed a kiss on her forehead. You really wished you could protect her from stuff like what happened last night, but knew this is what you would have to settle for. Even if it had been really nice waking up and seeing her there, after your initial freak out. At one point she started muttering in her sleep and you swore you heard your name. You smiled at the thought that she was dreaming of you and started to fall back asleep again. When you woke up, your chest felt light and you squinched your face. When you looked, you saw that Nepeta had rolled over and decided it was a good time to get up. You ended up spending the day watching Rom-coms with her, and as you were walking you thought about everything. You really wanted to tell her how you felt but you were worried it would make the friendship awkward. You only knew that in movies it usually did not end very well. You sighed, and when you got home stared at your computer screen. When you saw Sollux come online, you fought the urge to punch him in his stupid fucking face, but did not resist the urge to yell at him. You really honestly could not believe he would do that to someone like Nepeta, and you told him he should be lucky he was your friend otherwise the consequences would be much worse. Fucking asshole. When a couple hours of this had passed, you finally went and laid on your bed, but you didn't necessarily go to sleep. This was not unusual, as you usually spent your nights wide awake and thinking. As usual, tonight your mind was plagued by thoughts of nepeta and what you should do. You frankly had no idea and was unsure if you should make a move until you knew if she felt the same. But there were two problems with this. First, how would you know if she liked you unless you said something first, and second, why on earth would she have feelings for a piece of shit like you.


	7. Misunderstandings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look... I updated with less time in between this time. Yay!

When you got to school that next Monday, you went straight to gamzee. You figured since he was karkitty's best friend he should know what was up. When you pulled him aside and asked him to talk to you in purrivate, you saw karkitty shoot you an odd look. Inpurresting.... "Hey gamzee... I know this may sound really weird... but I was just wondering if you knew anything about any of karkittys crushes?" You stared down at the hem of your shirt, clasped tightly in your hands. You heard a chuckle and looked up with wide eyes. You should have known this was coming, that he would see right through you. "aww cmon cat sis like you don't already know?" You felt your heart drop as he ruffles your hair. "its pretty obvious who he has his eyes set on." he shrugged "but if you don't know im not gonna all up and motherfucking betray a brothers trust like that. if he hasnt told you i probably shouldnt either." Your shoulders slumped in disappointment. You guess it was obvious, there was no way he could pawsibly have a crush on you, especially not when you're competing against purrezi. She just was so much better and purretier than you were. It wasnt really fair. Gamzee tilted his head and looked at you odd as you looked at the ground and walked out the cafeteria. You could hear karkitty shouting at gamzee and you just didn't care. You almost ran out of there, trying to get out befur tears welled up and efurryone saw, running into the bathroom. You locked yourself in a stall and just sat there. At that point, you didn't even really care if anyone saw you, you just didn't want to be around your furriends. You couldn't believe you were so stupid as to think he could have pawsibly liked you back! It didn't even make sense and you didn't understand how after so long of ignoring your feelings, and knowing he would nefur reciprocate that it would still hurt as badly as it did to have it reaffirmed. You heard voices call your name, and you stopped sniffling fur long enough fur them to come in the bathroom and leave. You felt stupid and ridiculous. Especially so soon after efurrything that had happened with pawlux.  
~~~~~~~~~  
You saw nepeta pull gamzee to the side and was concerned. You saw the look on nepetas face when she looked at the hem of her shirt and was angry, thinking she had a crush on gamzee. Seriously, anyone but fucking gamzee. Then you saw her run off and was incredibly pissed. You shouted at gamzee, thinking he had turned her down in a harsh manner. "GAMZEE WHAT THE EVER LIVING FUCK DID YOU JUST DO? YOU FUCKING MADE HER CRY YOU ASSHOLE! WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HER?" Gamzee shook his head "Naw bro... you got it wrong... I just explained that i cant tell anyone bout my best friends interests if he hasnt already. I thought she already knew." Your eyes widened as you realized what just happened, and ran after her as fast as you could. You heard terezi and kanaya run after you, as well as equius. Fuck fuck fuck fuck... you had no idea how you would fix this. The girls went into the girls room and came out shaking their heads before going to check somewhere else with equius. You stood in front of the door though, waiting. "NEPETA YOU BETTER GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE RIGHT NOW... WE NEED TO HAVE A TALK." You could hear sniffles from out here. Fuck. God damn gamzee was so stupid sometimes. Of course it was obvious to him, you told him. To anyone else they would have thought he was talking about terezi. Then it hit you. Why would it bother her if she thought he meant terezi? Jesus christ, how could you have been so stupid.... You started to shout again at the door right as nepeta walked out. "Karkitty? What are you doing here..." She stared at the ground. "We need to talk nepeta...." She looked up at you frightened. You could feel your palms start to sweat and wiped them on your jeans. "Uh about what Gamzee said....."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bwoop cliff hanger ^.^


	8. I wish I could tell you how I feel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long y'all, school has been a real kick in my ass and I needed to figure out where to take this but I finally figured it out today ^.^ hope you guys like it.

"About what gamzee said...." You looked up at him with wide big eyes. "No it's ok Karkitty... I should have known you had feelings fur purrezi that's not what has me upset." You tried to pull as much info as you could to successfully pull off this lie. "It's just been really busy this week and there's a lot of stress and I just needed a break down that's all." You smiled weakly at him. "I'll be purrfectly ok don't worry yourself ofur me." You crossed your fingers behind your back, hoping it had worked. "Nepeta... I know that's not true. Gog I was so stupid for not fucking seeing it I'm sorry. I'm such a fucking asshole you deserve so much better than me." You shook your head quickly. "No! That's not true at all Karkitty. You're furry nice and you care about all your furriends and I know that you're secretly really sweet and you watch rom coms and stuff. You're not an asshole." He shook his head.  
\------  
Tell her tell her! You can't fucking tell her it would ruin your relationship with her. But she obviously seems to like you back she just fucking said so! Come on. You really need to get your head out of your ass. Ok. You can do this. "Nepeta I...." She tilts her head at you. "I just.... I don't think it's a good idea for you to be dating me. I'm not really interested in anyone right now." Wait.... What? You're not interested? You could beat your head against a wall but you refrain and make a mental note to do so later. "Oh.... Oh uh ok. I'm sorry if I was bothering you... Maybe I should just leave you alone...." Her eyes got big and you could see tears welling up in her eyes and before you could back track and fix you're mistake she was running off. The last thing out of your mouth was a pitiful "wait!"  
\-----  
How could you be so stupid? Of course he wasn't interested. You called your sister and went home early. You really weren't feeling very well at all. When you got home you threw yourself onto your bed crying before you started pounding into your pillows. When your sister called you down for dinner you pretended to be asleep. You felt so ridiculous. And now he' ll never want to talk to you again. He probably thinks you're a weirdo. You decide now is the time to finally cut him out. You refuse to cry over him or swoon over him any longer! No sir, you Nepeta Leijon are a strong independent woman and you definitely do not need a man. When it came to school the next day you didn't skip but you wished you had. Karkat was sitting on the very far end of the table staring into his food looking sad. You just sat next to Equius. You felt a little bad about not addressing karkat but you figured his life was better off without you anyway.  
\----  
You went to run after her but she was long gone. She wasn't in any of your classes either so you assumed she went home early. You banged your head against the wall, much to the chagrin of gamzee who tried to quiet you. "Aw motherfuck bro it ain't all that bad, what's the worse that could happen." You cringed at the thought of her hating you forever. Her thinking she wasn't good enough, her thinking that she was in the wrong, that you didn't want her in your life anymore. You ran home as soon as school was out and trying messaging her. When she didn't respond after a few hours you took your anger out on your bedroom wall, punching a hole into it before curling up on your bed and falling asleep to rom coms that made you cry because why did your life reflect them so perfectly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was originally going to put them together this chapter but I figured doing it this way would give me more to write about and not dead end me so here you go. I'm sorry about all the feels.


	9. Growing up.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry its been so long life has been hectic and my school schedule this semester is crazy on top of me thinking I updated awhile back ago. Anyway. This chapter is a mixture of kinda really sad and really cute. I actually almost cried a few times while writing it. I will trigger warning this though, there is a small mention of suicide kind of as well as abuse. If those things bother you id suggest perhaps skipping past this one, getting a summary detail from a friend. They're not incredibly prominant but they are there.

Wow. You didn't think it was possible to feel any worse than you did at this moment. Unless you were her. Then you probably would feel much worse. People kept cautiously asking if you were ok all month only to get snapped at. You were pretty sure you had bags under your eyes. It was impossible to sleep. You tried. Everytime you closed your eyes you saw her tear stained face. You wanted nothing more than to hold her and tell her it was ok. And you couldn't. Because you were a douche bag. You were pretty sure you deserved death. Probably would have tried if you hadn't realized that death would not be punishement enough for what you did. You deserved to have to live through this bullshit. That's how much of an ass you were. God did you hate life right now. She didn't even talk to you anymore. It was like you didn't exist. She didn't sit next to you in class, didn't sit near you at lunch. Equius kept giving you the evil eye. Eventually you stopped being able to handle the silent treatment and started eating lunch in a classroom by yourself. Even though the others talked to you it didn't help. All you could think about was how much of a prick you were and how you couldn't blame her for hating you. Sollux kept reaffirming this. Saying how while he fucked up you really fucking blew it. Gamzee kept telling you everything would be "motherfucking chill bro, just give it some time" which pissed you off more than Sollux did. No, isolation suited you much better. When you got home, you locked yourself away in your room. Your brother didn't even bother trying to talk to you much anymore as you had just become that hostile. Of course that didn't stop you from watching how she was doing as time passed. Before you knew it it was junior year and she had matured so much. She had ambitions and god damn had puberty hit her. She wasn't just cute and adorable anymore, although she still was very much so that, you couldn't help but notice once you finally got pulled back to the table. She was beautiful. She had definately grown, seeming to have shot upwards and decided to grow out her hair, usually keeping it in a ponytail. She would talk to you again now, but not nearly the same as she used to. And you watched her bring boy after boy into the group, you usually kept your head down because you knew otherwise you would say something harsh and mean to them and you couldn't have that. She hated you enough as it was. That didn't stop you from kicking their asses when they broke her heart though. Everytime Gamzee would give you this look when you came to school with a bruise. It looked sad and full of pity so you started to scowl at him. Eventually senior year hit, and you were so proud of her when she graduated. You had become close friends again but it still hurt your chest everytime she invited you to hang out and all you wanted to do was hold her and you couldn't. Because you had fucked up. Because you were certain any feelings she used to have for you were gone now. It almost killed you. Especially when you had to watch her crying. When her boyfriend of a year and a half broke up with her. It hurt to not be able to tell her how you felt. To not be able to tell her she wasn't hopeless, that you knew she wasn't unloved because you loved her. That those other boys were shit for breaking up with her when she refused to "put out". You couldn't understand why someone would only date her for that reason. She had so many other redeaming qualities....  
~~~~~  
You wanted to curl into a ball. Why did it always end up this way? You couldn't bear to tell karkat the biggest reason your recent ex broke up with you. You didn't want that embarrassment all over again. You'd finally picked yourself up and managed to be able to be friends with karkat without swooning over him. Or at least you had thought so. Yes, he had left because you wouldn't "put out". But the arguement before hand had been unbearable. The things he accused you of. "You hang around Karkat a lot, are you sure you're just friends? I'm fairly certain you have feelings for him. You'd rather be with him wouldn't you? You'd do it with him wouldn't you?" You remember tears streaming down your face as you tried to tell him that wasn't true. The worse part is you aren't even crying over the fact that he broke up with you anymore. It was how he treated you. You would tell others it wasn't the case, but he was truly manipulative and awful. Anytime you didn't do what he wanted he would throw insults at you, or get on your case about what ever it was you did wrong. And you always did something wrong. It was impossible to do anything right. You were just truly one large mistake. You were annoying and hyper and talked to much and god forbid should you draw. Some of your friends noticed your dwindling artwork, karkat especially, but you passed it off as not having time and not having the muse. Thing was your time was constantly occupied by that boy. You didn't have time for your hobbies. And barely any for your friends. And yet he claimed you still didn't spend enough time with him. The only time you got to spend with karkat is when he would sneak over at night because he couldn't deal with your family. You would draw then. You had to hide it, of course, so that you didn't get in trouble, but it was the only time you had left to be yourself. Of course eventually Damion found out. And it didn't stop at just words. He wasn't very happy about karkat coming over late at night. Not that you could honestly blame him. That week you went to school with long sleeves to hide the bruises from his grip. When people saw you said you fell. You honestly didn't know why you stayed. Probably because anytime the topic of breaking up came up he either got frightening or started to cry. You really just could not handle the crying. You were honestly somewhat relieved when he broke up with you, even though his accusations and reasons still hurt. But even so, half the time you always thought about how if you were with karkat you wouldn't have to worry about that kind of abuse. That he was always kind and gentle to you. But then you remembered his disinterest and shook it off. It was still nice having him there that night though and you were more than willing to let him comfort you. In fact, it was really nice to just curl up on the couch with him and watch movies until you both passed out. For being as lanky and skinny as he was, he was quite comfortable to lay with, and a really adorable sleeper. You couldn't help but notice how puberty had affected him, not that you hadn't noticed previously but that was besides the point. His face had thinned out somewhat, and his arms had grown longer. He was able to wrap them easily around you and still have arm left over. His legs were so long they draped off the side of the couch, even with his head on the arm. Meanwhile you're feet barely went half way past his knees and your arms were only long enough to make it to his side. You were comfortable though, and eventually passed out like that, snuggled once more into your safe place.


	10. In which shit goes down.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter in which Karkat gets drunk and wakes up confused

You cleaned the kitchen counters as Nepeta walked in, setting her back pack on the couch and walking to the kitchen and sitting on the counter. You sighed and darted your eyes up to her, seeing the innocent look she was already giving you. Fuck. She wanted something. She always made that face when she wanted something from you. And it was usually the same thing. "Hey Karkitty? There's supposed to be a party tonight... Will you go with me?" Shit. You knew it. You had heard about the party from Sollux and said no, but you knew he would probably go and tell Nepeta about the party because he knew if he told Nep she would want to go and she would drag you along with. Not only did you hate going to parties in general, but you hated going to parties with Nepeta. Not because she got drunk and made out with a bunch of people like some other girls did (cough Vriska cough) because she didn't. But mainly because going to parties meant Nepeta got drunk and Nepeta getting drunk meant you taking her home and having to change her into something that closely resembled pajamas and getting her into bed. Not that you necessarily minded taking care of her but it was a little awkward for you to do the undressing part because you still had feelings for her and you tried very very hard to respect her and her body. "Nepeta you know I don't like going to those things and you always end up getting out of control and I have to take care of you." You looked at her and saw her sad eyes and sighed. "That's not to say I mind taking care of you, but I have to wonder if it doesn't bother you that we've never dated and I've seen you in your underwear...." She shook her head. "I trust you, and I know you wouldn't do anything if you didn't think I was ok with it or if I couldn't consent." You sighed and shook your head again. "Fine... I'll go." She squeaked happily before jumping off the counter to hug you and run into her room. You figured you didn't have a choice anyway because since Sollux was hosting it there was a good chance she would go with or without you and you weren't sure if you wanted her around that many boys in that state of mind. You also knew she was now in her bedroom getting dressed for it which meant she was going to look incredibly good and it was going to be incredibly painful to you as well as attractive to you and any boy there. That's just how she did it, you didn't understand how.

You finished cleaning the kitchen before going into your room to put on a t-shirt that didn't look like shit and a pair of jeans that weren't ripped to hell and back. When you got out you saw she was already dressed and ready to go, wearing an olive green dress that barely made it to her knees, a pair of flats that looked good with the dress but was still sensible (Nepeta hated heels) and her long hair curled. You inwardly groaned and grabbed the keys to your apartment, figuring you might as well just walk over there since Sollux and Dave lived less than half a block away and you felt like you strongly needed a drink. Plus, if anything else you knew Dave would give you two a ride home. He owed you one and never drunk at these stupid things anyway. While you walked there, you felt your hand brush against Nepeta's a few times and felt incredibly self conscious about it, sticking your hands in your pockets after the fourth time. When you got there and got inside it was a loud mess of noise and people and Dave running the music, which meant it would actually be halfway decent music. John walked up to you, obviously already half way to drunk and was rambling about some prank when you rolled your eyes and pushed past him, Nepeta already long gone. You went to the kitchen and grabbed yourself something to drink, something that was actually strong which warranted you a look from Sollux. "What? It's going to be a long fucking night don't look at me like that." He just smirked at you and looked over in the direction of Nepeta. If you had already started drinking you would have been able to punch him without giving a fuck, however you had not made it to that point as of yet and so you kept your fist to your side as you wandered off to talk to others. 

After a few hours of drinking and having a few people talk to you and deciding that you were too far gone to think about going home (which included thoughts of laying in bed with Nepeta that you tried very hard to ignore), you went in search for Nepeta to tell her it was time to go. When you found her she was what seemed to be receiving the attentions of some other boy, but did not seem too disappointed to go home. She also seemed to be the only sober one out of the two of you which was unusual. As you walked home it was fairly silent. She asked you if you were ok and you nodded and said you were fine just had a lot on your mind. The instant you got into the door of your apartment though, your self control failed you and you pulled her in to hug her tight to yourself. She seemed startled and confused as you held on to her. "Karkitty?" You sighed, trying to think of what to do before shrugging. "Nepeta... I have to tell you something..." Her voice sounded panicked at this point. "Are you ok? What's wrong?" As you tried to find the words to tell her how you felt, you instead leaned down and kissed her. Your head kept screaming at you about how stupid you were, and you expected her to push you away, but instead you felt her kiss back. Next thing you know, your running your hand up her dress and her hand is in her shirt. And then you aren't too sure of what happens after that, but you know you woke up next to her in the morning.

~~~~~~~

Nothing had happened last night. You were actually sober enough to know this, even though Karkitty apparently had not been. You found it a little amusing that he didn't remember what happened after he kissed you. You were actually incredibly surprised by that, but you also didn't mind and had been hoping he would eventually make a move and that's why you dressed the way you did when the two of you went to parties, was to grab his attention. What had actually happened after he kissed you, was that he apologized profusely and explained how he had liked you since high school. He then apologized for being "such a shit" in high school. You told him it was ok, and nuzzled his cheek lightly before taking him to get him into his pajamas and tucking him into bed, which he pulled you into and snuggled you until he fell asleep. Little did you realize that all those times you fell asleep cuddling him in high school he had had a death grip on you. So you ended up stuck there and laughing at him when he woke up, freaking out about whether or not he had done something inappropriate to you.


	11. beginning of cute coupley things

You woke up and snuggled into the warm body that was Nepeta in your arms. Wait, no... that was a dream. Your face scrunched up. Wait.... you opened an eye to see Nepeta laying there breathing softly in her sleep. Holy shit, this wasn't a dream. Your face scrunched up even more. Oh... shit. You were dating. That was right. You mentally berated yourself for having forgotten that. Again. Every morning for the past week you had to remind yourself and the whole week had felt dream like. Sometimes Nepeta slept in her own bed, but more often than not you found her in your arms. Mostly because you had a bad habit of getting nightmares. And while she would help you sleep before you were dating she usually went back to her bed after you passed out. Or at least you were pretty sure she did. You weren't really sure of much anymore except work. Which you didn't have today so you fell back asleep.

\--------

You cracked an eye open, sure karkat was asleep before carefully making your way out of his arms. It was a weird concept that you were now dating your childhood crush, but you were happy. You got up and showered before quietly making your way out to grab donuts and coffee. When you got back you were greeted by a very sleepy, very disgruntled Karkitty. You raised an eyebrow as he muttered something inintelligable and handed him his coffee, causing him to grunt. You smiled as you put the donuts on the table, opening the box and grabbing you favorite one and plopping onto the couch. He eventually followed after, munching on a pink glazed donut as you two watched some tv.


	12. School, work, movies and other fun adventures.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry my updating is so sporadic, theres been a lot of stuff going on at home thats been keeping me from wanting to write, but I should be working on updating more often (fingers crossed), especially since one of the tasks im doing to feel better about everything is writing in my journal something, anything (aka mostly a lot of short fiction blurbs) so. I should be having the muse to do this more often, we shall see.

Things had gotten a little hectic as of late as you and Karkat were both in the process of going through college to do your own individual things, you working to get a degree to be a vet with a minor in art while he worked on whatever it was he felt like doing at the time. Right now you think it was on drama but you couldn't always be sure. By the time you both got home, between classes, clubs and work, you tended to be exhausted and just passed out on the couch. However, today your schedules happened to match up and you both had the entire day off. So after catching up on your sleep, you decided to go out to the movies together with some friends after much pestering from their end. It was a fairly decent movie, even if Karkat kept grumbling about how he should have just saved his money... He was always the grumpy puss who felt he would be better off waiting until it came out on Netflix or he could just rent it for cheaper. 

 

Somehow, you and your friends convinced him to go to karaoke, which was always a blast. He refused to sing at first, no matter how hard you pouted. Even Eridan and Sollux went up and sang but Karkat just wouldn't budge, so you sang double to make up for it. Eventually he decided he would, singing a song from one of his favorite musicals. He was always kind of cheesy like that, even if he did like coming across as grumpy and mean he never could fully pull it off, he was much too kind hearted. It always made you smile, especially when it came to animals. It was nearly impossible to get him to /not/ stop for animals. That's how you almost ended up with five animals, was because neither of you could safely walk past the animal shelters without almost bringing one of the sad looking animals home. That was part of why you wanted to work as a Vet, was to help sick animals and bring them back to health as well as all the other tasks that came with the job. You knew by now that it was far from a pretty task but it was well worth it, or you thought so at least. On the side you worked for the animal shelter, which caused even more issues as far as the pet situation went. Karkat didnt visit you at work anymore.

You guys ended up staying fairly late at karaoke, causing you and karkat to be exhausted again when you got home, but that was ok. You grabbed one of the blankets from the bedroom, after both you and Karkat had changed into pajamas, and made a bowl of popcorn, deciding the two of you would curl up on the couch and watch one of his favorite romcoms. You curled up together, your fingers intertwined as you watched it, eventually falling asleep right there on the couch. Karkat didn't mind though, it was a usual occurrence and it usually ended the same, with him carefully cleaning up and carrying you off to bed. You woke up just enough for just long enough to snuggle into him in bed before you passed out again.

\----

Once you had managed to get the two of you into bed, you felt safe falling asleep yourself, kissing the top of her head gently and running your fingers through her hair, listening to her purr as she started to fall back asleep. These moments, you felt, were always the best and most calming. The ability to just lay there and listening to her breath helping you sleep better than you had in years, and her presence alone making you feel better about yourself in general, not that your image of self relied on other people much anymore. Since you started college you had started to mature quite a bit more than you previously were, you were still grumpy and angry a lot but it was usually mostly just a rouse and everyone knew it. You smiled more often than you used to and people had started to notice, and it made it easier to be around others. You no longer felt like you were worthless, and no longer debated what the purpose of your existence was, even if you were still unsure what that was exactly.

That night you laid there wondering exactly why it took you so long to tell Nepeta how you felt as it did. You felt as though you would have been much better off telling her from the beginning, but you also realized that had you done so the two of you wouldn't have developed as people the same way as you did and your relationship would not only probably not have been quite as good as it is now but it also wouldn't have lasted as long. While you still regretted your hesitance, you also realized it was for the best. You were pretty positive you wouldn't ask for things to be any different than they are now. This was just perfect for you.


End file.
